What I wish for you in 2017: the true meaning of balance (give it a chance)
About 1 week ago, I woke up at 4 am at my father's house in Switzerland.
I was jet lagged. Felix had just fallen asleep again but I found myself wide awake, lying in the comfort of my family home, staring into darkness, thoughts wandering through different periods of my life, re-living and re-feeling certain experiences in my life.
I oddly find myself grateful for the quiet morning hours I am gifted when traveling abroad and being jet lagged. Somehow they seem like the quietest, most undisturbed times these days. They also always allow for deep reflection and space to feel.
My thoughts wandered to you and I began to think about what I wish for you in 2017.
What do I wish for YOU -women who have signed up to follow my emails, my blogposts, and, to a much smaller extent, my own journey as a mom, a wife, a woman who dedicates her professional life to coach other women on how to make life richer and on how to intentionally create hormonal and emotional balance in order to become a mom (may the focus be on life before pregnancy, during pregnancy, or after our little loves have arrived).
I've noticed over the years that many people grapple with the word "balance."
Many lack it.
Most want it.
Some find it aloof.
And others don't believe it exists and therefore, reject it entirely.
As we are entering 2017, I want to share my personal definition on what balance is and how to go about creating it in your life.
I believe that creating balance is one of those essential aspects of life that either create health or, if we lack it for prolonged times, creates disharmony and disease.
First, let's look at the human body:
One of the body's primary jobs is to maintain homeostasis, which is "any self-regulating process by which biological systems tend to maintain stability while adjusting to conditions that are optimal for survival. If homeostasis is successful, life continues; if unsuccessful, disaster or death ensues." [1]
For example, if the body stops maintaining homeostasis, we wouldn't be able to maintain a normal body temperature when it's cold or hot outside, our pulse wouldn't go back to normal after a sprint, we wouldn't be able to balance our blood-sugar.
I believe that in order to create optimal health in our life, we have to replicate this kind of homeostasis in our emotional and personal lives as well. We do that by being intentional about creating balance.
How, you ask?
By cultivating a sharp awareness for what is costing you energy and what is fueling you with energy.
Over the years, I've become sharply aware that the women who feel the most imbalanced, stressed and unfulfilled AND the women who are faced with the most pains, aches and hormonal imbalances are the ones who live lives that are filled with activities, jobs and people who are COSTING them energy.
They do not LEAD their own lives, often have poor boundaries, have difficulty expressing their emotions in a way that they are heard and received by others, feel lots of guilt and inner tension, believe that unless they are perfect they are not lovable, suppress their own creativity, and generally, don't make their own well-being and happiness a priority because they have never been taught how to practice true self-care from a loving and self-approving way.
On the contrary, the women I've met and worked with who are the most resilient, who can experience stress but quickly return to a state of calm homeostasis, who feel the most optimistic and have the healthiest hormonal profile, are he ones whose lives are generally filled with activities, jobs and people who are FUELING them with energy.
They are true LEADERS of their lives. They know how to say "no" in a way that is kind yet firm, they can communicate their emotions in a way that honestly reflects how they feel, they don't feel guilty about not making space for everyone, they are specific about who they invite to be their closest companions, they practice self-care that feels intuitive and kind, and they generally know how to let things go and move on in a positive direction. Faith in themselves isn't lost because of a hiccup.
Here is what I want you to know: no matter where you are in your life currently, whether you feel like you have no balance at all, whether you feel like you are the victim of your circumstances, whether you've been struggling at your job for a while, whether you've experience hormonal distress, infertility or pain, I want to lovingly remind you that YOU ARE THE LEADER OF YOUR LIFE and that you CAN create balance.
I am a huge believer in the strength, the creativity and the resilience that we as women have and I know (because I've seen it 100s of times) that you have what it takes to make the changes you need in order to create balance and harmony -physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually.
Living in balance doesn't mean you are never stressed.
Naturally all of us go through phases of more work and more stress or heartache and loss, but you have to make sure that those phases are followed by phases that are replenishing your energy.
That is in your hands.
Creating this kind of balance for yourself in 2017 is what I wish for you.
It is the foundation for great love, great work, hormonal harmony, as well as a fulfilling experience when it comes to raising a family. A mom (or dad!) who is constantly running on empty (not occasionally!) isn't serving herself and therefore cannot be as nurturing to her family as I know you can.
With love as always.
Happy 2017.
<3
[1] https://www.britannica.com/science/homeostasis